Can Finally See The Light

Before I went to nursing school I wanted to be a midwife.  When I lived in DC I went to doula training with DONA.  I also went to a four day childbirth education training class in Boone, North Carolina with Lamaze International.  I dreamed of delivering babies.  It seemed so long and impossible at the time because I had four very small children and a not so supportive husband (the ex factor now).  After my divorce I put myself through nursing school, while working on an OB floor in administration for 6 years.  So at that time I was submerged in OB related stuff.

After graduation I was fortunate to slide right into labor and delivery.  I was thrilled.  It was magical.  I was living my dream...sort of.  That was the reason I went to school in the first place.  Devouring Ina Mae's Spiritual Midwifery Book and dreaming of baby catching.....after about 3 years into it things sort of got jaded.  I wasn't sure what I wanted anymore.  4 years into it I started suffering from a little burnout.  Working at two hospitals started wearing me thin I think.

I was getting disheartened by people around me saying it wasn't worth it...the crappy pay, the responsibility, the liability....how it was so not worth it.  We can make so much more at the bedside.  Well, I began to look around and realized that bedside nurses are by far getting rich.  I started to read my midwifery books again, started to do some serious soul searching.  Began to feel my dream and aspiration coming back.  Realized that regardless of money, other peoples opinions, call hours, ect. in my heart I have always wanted to deliver babies.

I am happy and excited to say that I am getting my application ready to submit to grad school to start in the fall this year.  I picked Frontier School of Midwifery due to it's stellar reputation and recommendations.  I am hoping to relocate back up North in three years, back to New England, and practice.  One day at a time.